I know it's been awhile. Sorry. Life again has been hectic. The Vian family has succumbed to the lurking viruses in the air. It hasn't been pretty.
So I had this great preface to this little story in my head this morning. It was eloquent. But now it's late afternoon, I'm fresh out of energy (and fluids for that matter), so I'm going to write thoughtlessly...but heartfelt.
Last night as I put away the kids laundry, alone upstairs, I was just thinkin'. Nothing important...just stuff.
And then I had a visitor.
And I turned to see my boy...joining me in his room. Up 14 stairs...all by himself. Cause he's strong!
You might think climbing the stairs isn't a big deal.
But it is.
I remember the day McCall and Bodie took thier first steps. And how we clapped and cried, celebrating another page turned in the epic novel of our life. It was a very big deal, indeed.
And I remember the day we heard the words "delayed milestones" and how we thought that would be very, very hard.
I hardly ever think about "delayed milestones" anymore. I like the way he skids his belly across the floor to crawl, the way his body forms like putty in my arms. And though every once in awhile, I wonder if he knows he can't quite keep up like the other kids--and that question alone saddens me--it is fleeting, turned off with a powerful switch I control. But, you know when I think most about delayed milestones?
...when he nails them. Boo yah!
It is beautiful. The proud smile, the echo of clapping, the way his sister and brother run to pat him on the back and sweetly chirp "Good job, Rhyser" or that tiny little second I share with Rob...when our eyes meet and smile and blink back a tear or two because we share the fact that he is ours, and he is growing.
When they tell you your child will have delayed milestones, it means less that you will struggle and ache for those events to come but more that when they
do come, your heart will leap, your soul will celebrate and your arms will stretch to hold and kiss the growing one that forever surprises you.
We celebrate climbing of stairs like it was walking first steps. Those aren't too far off. He knows he's strong now. He's aware of his capabilities. And we will continue to encourage that awareness, applauding and praising the ever present gifts our littles possess.
And, in this moment, I am reminded of some of the best advice I've received this past year.
"Put the Angelman Syndrome books away. They'll be there when you need them. Instead, go out and buy a copy of a book you'll find more useful.
Dr. Seuss' Oh, the Places You Will Go."
My sweet kiddos. You are capable, you are loved, you are celebrated.
And oh, the places you will go.
I've missed this. Just me, miss and daddy. Sure, there are myriads of moments where we're together, but sometimes I'm turning the pages of Goodnight Moon while simultaneously balancing a baby. And, in the middle of a puzzle with her the other day, I jumped up to rescue stunt man Rhys from falling off the couch. "He's fine, momma," McCall said as if her denial would convince me to stay and play.
It felt good to be back in the swing of things, to know that life being altered a bit doesn't change everything and there are so many more of these days--with all my kids--to come.
but we can tell you this though…
We have changed. Our eyes have been opened to the broad spectrum of beauty, the value of uniqueness and the amazement of the common thread that binds us all regardless of the color of our skin or the makeup of our chromosomes. How could I not have been aware of this magic?
We are grateful for the pain that propelled us forward, without it; we wouldn't have known the joy of this place.
So I am thrilled to be taking part in our very first ASF walk. I won't walk alone, but with some very powerful women by my side. I will walk proudly with Rhys, because I know what this walk can do.
The One Step Closer ASF National Walk has been a vital source of funding support to the Angelman Syndrome Foundation since its initial launch in 1999. What started with one volunteer walk site has grown to now include 29 walk sites across the country and is recognized as the signature fund-raising event for the organization. By supporting the National Walk we are helping researchers at ASF move one step closer to improving the lives of those impacted by AS through information, education, resources, support, advocacy and research.
We want this life-changing year to propel us forward…to learn and except. To work towards a cure. ASF works towards this, so we are thrilled to support their efforts.
Like many others who set out on this journey, we have struggled through a range of emotions. Support came though--through loving friends and family, through education, through falling in love with our son who turned out to be the greatest blessing and just what our family needed. We are learning more every day, and, through Rhys, we've discovered a new world of acceptance and opportunity for the individuals in our world with AS.
Our fund-raising page can be accessed here, or the ASF button on the top of my blog. 
But the house thing has gotta change. Sunday, Uncle J watched the kids while both of the parental units worked. When I returned home I noticed a slight baby powder scent in the air but thought nothing of it...
"Holy S@#t, what happened?"
And I say this all for two reasons. I feel like I get a lot done. Therapist, cupcakes, craft projects, doctors, preschool...but there's always not-so-fun stuff that gets left out here. Cleaning house is one of many. But also, sometimes writing about something helps me overcome it, and it feels good in that proclaiming-New-Year's-resolution way to publicly sign a declaration of Hey, I have a problem and Hey, I wanna fix it.
So, I'm going to try really hard to change this problem. This week, I'm weeding out, tidying up, and reorganizing some priorities. For my family, for my kids, but mostly for me. Because I'm really good with new challenges.
I guess I'll leave the jello salads to Grandma Rene, she's a pro. I will attempt green rice krispies in a moment. I shall not fail!
You might think climbing the stairs isn't a big deal. 
